My Little Angel
by Lilianar
Summary: Rose and Dimitri finally gave into their love inside a small cabin right before being attacked by Strigoi. Dimitri fought hard and brave but it wasn't enough and became Strigoi. Rose knows she must hunt him down, she must free him from what he's become but what happens when Rose learns she is pregnant? Will she be able to kill the father of her child? Will she let her love fade?
1. Chapter 1

**Hello there! This is my first FanFiction so please review and let me know what you think. I know the whole "Rode gets pregnant and Dimitir leaves to guard Tasha" thing has been done so many times but this is a bit different. This is set right after the attack on St. Vladamirs and Dimitri has become Strigoi. Rose is ready to leave on her hunt to find him when she finds out she is PREGNANT! What will she do? Will she continue on her search?**

 **Please review and tell me what you think, it really will help!**

 **Story Shall now begin :)**

 **:)**

Eventually this pain would disappear or so I've been telling myself. But did I really want it to disappear? It was the only real evidence I had that in some way, shape, or form I was still connected to him. It was evidence that what we had was real. I needed this pain, I craved it to constantly remind me of him. Him.

I looked up from my bed that I was currently laying on and stared across to the almost blank white wall only holding a few items, mostly pictures, one of them being Lisaa and I a few years ago dressed as ferries. Lissa, I couldn't dare think of her before the guilt rose in me. I knew what I was planning on doing would hurt her and I knew if I gave myself to much time to think it over I would soon back out of what was surely going to be the hardest thing id have to do in my life. With that In mind my eyes darted to the calendar hanging only a few feet away from the picture I was just looking at.

2 days. Only 2 more days. Its been 6 long days since I lost the love of my life. Its been 6 days of laying in my room and crying, only leaving to use the restroom and opening the door to pick up a tray of food Lissa laid out for me. After the attack I couldn't talk to anyone and I knew it hurt her. She wanted to help but she couldn't. No one could. 2 more days. 2 more days till I was 18. 2 more days till I went after the love of my life on a hunt to kill him.

I woke up early in the morning which really meant the complete opposite to the human world. I knew where I had to go before I stopped by Kirovas office. I made my way through the buildings as fast as possible, avoiding any chance of running into anyone. Running straight through the large black double doors of guest quarters and lightly tapping the door waiting for him to open up. I waited and waited. He didn't answer, of course he didn't. He might be a heavier sleeper than me. I was scared of waking up any other guests but then I thought again, who would stay here as a guest after the tragic attack? I started to bang the door but still no answer. I was frustrated at this point. This was not going as planned. Without even hesitating I grabbed the door handle intending to pick the lock and turned it slightly to the left.

Of course it opened, why couldn't I have tried that. Adrian must have been to drunk last night lock it. I walked into the spacious room styled as an open studio with a small kitchen and a little sitting area. I wasn't sure what I expected but it definitely wasn't it being this clean, not a single dish in the sink or a shirt on the floor. My eyes quickly adjusted enough for me to locate the light switch and flicked it on half hoping for Adrian to stir awake irritated. There in the middle of the room layed Adrian on his bed, looking quite peaceful and almost baby like.

I took a moment to think about what I was about to do. Could I really ask Adrian to fund my crazy hunt of freeing my love? I almost smacked myself, doubting Adrian. Adrian would do it, he would give me all the money I wanted. He would do it because he loved me.

I approached Adrian, climbing onto the bed and stirring him awake.

"Adrian, come on. Adrian wake up its important". After attempting and failing to wake him up I decided to get a little rougher.

"Adrian! Wake up now!". Giving him one last push on the shoulder I stated to see him waking up, bring a hand to rub his eyes. I quickly jumped off the bed but stood close by.

Adrian slowly sat up and looked up to me "Ah Little Dhampir what is the meaning of such a wonderfully early visit?"

"Adrian I need your help."

With that he sat up straighter and got serious.

"Rose what's going on? What do you need? Anything you name it."

I hesitated before telling him "Adrian I have to find him. I need to find him".

I could see understanding flashing in his eyes that what closely resembled pity. "Rose he's gone he's -" Before he could finish I cut him off. "Adrian I know he's gone and I'm not going to get him. I'm going to kill him. Adrian I can't be okay, I cant live, until he's free"

"Little Dhampir come here" I climbed back onto the bed without hesitation and he grabbed pulling me into his chest. "How can I help you Rose?"

"Adrian, I never thought I'd ask you but I need money". I heard a soft chuckle and his chest rumble a bit before he laid a small kiss on my head. "Anything for you". With that he let me go and started to climb out of bed.

He reached into his closet as I heard a few electronic clicks and a door opening. Over his shoulder I could see there was a safe seated on the second shelf of his closet. He turned around after a few seconds holding a very large stack of cash walking towards me. When he looked back up to me I swear his eyed budged out of his head. Without thinking he stopped his tracks and dropped the cash staring wide eyed at me.

My instincts kicked in and I quickly got up racing to him, his eyes never leaving me. "Adrian, what's wrong? Adrian talk to me".

"Your Aura".

I was taken a bit by surprise that my Aura had caused this reaction out of him.

"What is it blacker than usual? I feel fine. I feel under control". I wasn't sure what else could be wrong.

Adrian quickly snapped out of it and grabbed me, pulling me to his chest and holding me so I tight my body started to ache. He reached up to run his hands over my hair "Rose its going to be okay, you're going to be okay".

My patience was thinning with the worry I heard in his voice. I harshly pushed back escaping Adrian's grip.

"What the hell is going on Adrian?"

"Rose. I hadn't noticed it earlier because I had my wall up but when I put it down to see how you were really feeling…"

"Yeah…. Continue" I persuaded.

"Rose I don't just see one Aura when I look at you"

"What?" feeling dumbfounded. "What does that mean" I asked still confused.

"Rose. I see two. I only see two auras in one person when…..". I could sense the hesitation in him. I started to get frustrated. "Adrian spit it!"

"I only see two Auras when a person is pregnant".


	2. Chapter 2

"Adrian, no. This really isn't the tie for your jokes"

"Rose. God. I wish I was joking"

"Your drunk because its really not possible" I wouldn't let myself believe his stupidity.

"I've only been with one person Adrian" I whispered as I looked down at my feet. This couldn't be possible. It just isn't

"Rose, I don't know how. I don't."

I wouldn't let myself think too much about this. Adrian was lying. There must be something wrong with his Aura visioning. I'd only been with Dimitri. Dimitri was a Dhampir. I would never have been able to give him what I know he wanted, a family. A tear escaped my eyes as I let the idea of having a happy family with Dimitri cloud my mind. I'd do anything to have Dimitri back.

Coming back to where I was in the now I looked up to see Adrian looking deep into me. "Rose….." was all he managed to say before he rushed to my side held me tight and wiped the tears that had now escaped repeatedly one after another.

"Adrian, I miss him"

"Oh Little Dhampir, Id bring him back myself if I could. I can't bare to see you like this" whispering lightly into my ear.

"You need to go to the doctor"

I pushed him back and glared into his eyes. "Adrian! I'm not pregnant, I've only been with a dhampir. Why are you doing this to me?!"

With that I ran out of the room leaving behind Adrian standstill in the middle of the room. I ran and ran. I wasn't sure where I was running to but I needed to run.

I could almost picture my sweet Russian running alongside me. God. Why? Why did you leave me? Why did you leave me alone…?"

Without realizing it I had ended up in the cabin. I slowly approached the door and pushed it open. Stepping in I looked around before my eyes landed on the small bed in the coroner. I couldn't help it, this was the first time I had been here since the night of the attack. I fell onto the bed letting the tears roll out. It hurt. My heart hurt.

I laid on that bed watching the sun rise, then set. Watching the way the trees blew with the wind. I didn't think of much, letting the numbness set in.I don't know how long I laid there, in and out of sleep I only moved to use the restroom.

I slowly drifted back to sleep after watching the sunrise for the second time in a row and let the welcoming drowsiness overcome me.

What a beautiful place, surely I must have died. The bright sun felt warm on my skin I hadn't noticed how cold I was in the cabin till now. Or was I imagining that. I assumed it was cold… hmmmm.

"Little Dhampir"

I turned slightly not wanting to remove my toes from the warm sand.

"Shit. I'm not dead"

"Dead? Why would you be dead? Rose what are you doing in the waking world? Rose, we've been looing for you! Its been 3 days! What are you doing? You're on a weird sleep schedule and I couldn't reach you till now! "

"I'm sleeping or else I wouldn't be here"

"Rose. Stop. Where are you. I just want to help you".

"You can't help me Adrian. I don't need help". Then just like that I remembered why I had gone to Adrian in the first place.

"I need to go to him. I am going. I need to wake up, I'm leaving campus once I'm up"

"Rose. With what money? You left it all."

Shit. I had completely forgot about that as I was running from his room.

"I'll figure it out. "

"What about Lissa?"

The guilt hit me hard then but I quickly pressed it down so I would stop thinking about it. "She'll be fine"

"What about the baby?"

"Adrian I'm not pre-". He quickly grabbed my arms cutting me off from finishing my sentence.

"Rose listen to me now! You are pregnant. You really are and you need to get help. " Before I could object he cut me off and continued.

"Rose I've been thinking about this a lot and I think the fact that you're shadowkissed had an affect on you being able to get pregnant." With that I quickly quieted down and stood still.

"I think that you are more than 50% moroi. When Lissa brought you back from the dead I think she gave you a piece of her. I don't know if its true but it's a possibility. Rose please listen to me, wake up and meet me at the clinic"

I didn't want to believe him. I couldn't. I couldn't be pregnant. I hadn't noticed I was sobbing until I fell Adrian realease his hold on my arms and wrap me in his embrace. "Shhhh Little Dhampir, it'll be alright. "

He pulled away just the slightest bit to look me in the eyes "Rose, don't go yet. Wake up and meet me at the Clinic. If you really aren't pregnant then there is no foul done. Please" he begged.

"Don't tell Lissa. I'll come back and meet you at the Clinic but I don't want anyone knowing of anything that may or may not be true". With that I started yanking myself out of the dream and woke.

God it was cold. Fucking Cold.

I sat up and pressed a hand to my flat stomach. Its not possible. It couldn't be. I had promised to meet him at the Clinic and I always keep my promise. With that I headed back through the forest on the outskirts of campus. I let my mind drift to Dimitri & I walking back from the cabin after falling into each others love. How he promised we'd be together and that he loved me. I saw it in his eyes when the Strigoi attacked us, he really did love me.

I would go to the Clinic and prove Adrian wrong. Nothing was stopping me from killing the love of my life.


	3. Chapter 3

2Standing outside of the clinic I couldn't help but think back to when I had broken my ankle after Victor withered the wood on the bleachers. God I just remember the quick pain that shot through me before I blacked out. At least I thought I blacked out but everyone told me I came in screaming and kicking in my Russians arms. I wish I was conscious enough to have known he was holding me. I wish I could store that memory for me to remember forever but the pure imagination of it will have to do. Thankfully Lissa healed me, she shouldn't have because it feeds to the darkness, but still I was very thankful. What was so special to me about that very memory is the gift that Dimitri had given me. Lip gloss, the one I liked. A simple gift but it meant so2as his reasoning, a simple because he wanted to. He just wanted to give me something and that something I cherished fondly.

"Little Dhampir, as much as I like starring at you from afar we really should go in. I already informed everyone that was looking for you that you're okay. You gave us a small scare there. You gave Lissa a pretty big one actually. She wanted to se you but I wouldn't tell her where you were at. I thought maybe you'd want to tell her this yourself".

"You're right. I don't want her here right now. I need to clear this all up first." I let a few seconds go by.

"Why are you helping me?"

"Do you really not know?"

"I guess I do". He was helping me because at the end of the day he was a good friend. A good friend that happened to love me.

I heavily sighed "Lets go in".

Adrian followed close behind me as I entered through the glass door into the cold room.

"Rose! Goodness Gracious I swear I see you more often than should be allowed" she lightly joked. "What can I help you with Rose?"

"Hi Dr. Olendzki. I'm okay, mostly." Where do I start?

"Let's go into one of the rooms Rose"

I followed her into one of the private examination rooms, Adrian following behind.

Dr. Olendzki seemed to have jut noticed his presence when he walked into the room. She gave me a quick questioning look asking if it was okay.

"Uhhh yeah, I want him here". Adrian sat down at the only available chair besides the one that Dr. Olendzki seemed to have claimed already so I had no other choice but to hop onto the examination bed chair.

"Okay Rose. What's going on?"

"Well you see…" How would I go about this… how?

I felt Adrian's hand sit on my knee and give it a squeeze as he looked at me encouragingly.

"Adrian thinks I might be pregnant" I blurted.

"Adrian thinks…?" You could hear the shock in her voice.

I looked at Adrian, he must have seen the desperation in me because he sat a little taller before clearing his voice.

"As you know, Spirit comes with a lot of uhhhhhh…. perks. One of them being I can see auras. When I look at Rose I see two. I've only ever seen two when im looking at a pregnant person. "

"Oh Dear…"

"He could be wrong about this though!"

"I never have been before…." I heard him whisper.

"Well Rose, there's only one place to be sure right at this moment".

She got up reached through one of the white cabinets on the wall and pulled out a thin blue box. She turned around and passed it to me.

"Here you go Rose. The bathroom is right behind you, take your time we'll be here".

I stepped off and walked into the bathroom. I locked the door behind me and opened up the little blue box, shaking out the stick into my palm. I wasn't surprised she had given me a pregnancy test. It was the fastest way as of right now. I'm sure she would take some sort of blood test or something but don't those things usually take days?

I looked up into the mirror and stared at myself. This is ridiculously impossible. I sighed and truned away from the toilet. Lets get this over with.

I stepped out of the bathroom a few minutes later. Adrian shot up out of his seat, worry clearly seen in face. "Rose… How do you feel?"

"I haven't seen the result. It said it could take up to 5 minutes. I left it on the sink." Truth be told I was on minute number four when I started to get scared. What if it was true? I mean it couldn't be… but if it was? What would I do? This would change everything.

"Well would you say its been about 5 minutes?"

"Yes, Dr. Olendzki I think it has been"

"Would you like me to go check on the results"

I looked down at the floor to ashamed at how scared this all really made me feel. "Yes please."

She walked past me, squeezing my shoulder in a comforting way before heading into the bathroom. I looked up into Adrian's eyes and couldn't hold back the one tear that rolled down my face. He slowly walked towards me and wiped the tear away with his long thin fingers. "Rose. You're going to be okay. I'll make sue of it."

Dr. Olendzki walked out the restroom holding a thin white bag. There must have been a bag in the bathroom because I was 99% sure that my test was there. I saw it in her eyes before she told me.

"Oh shit." Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. …..

I wasn't even listening to them. Clearly they were trying to get my attention but I needed it to stop. I needed the world to stop. This couldn't be happening. No it couldn't. There's no possible way. I'm a Dhampir. I've only been with a Dhampir. I could not be pregnant with Dimitri's child. No. No. No….

"Rose! Snap out of it! Look at me! " I hadn't noticed Adrian was holding my upper arms. " Adrian Oh God…."

I couldn't hold my body up anymore I wanted to fall on the ground and lay in my own little bubble. I felt my knees weakening and fell into Adrian's arm as I sobbed.

"Shhh Rose. I told you. I'll take care of you"

I was Rose Hathaway! I don't need anyone to take care of me. I can take care of myself. That thought quickly vanished as I started to think of how Dimitri said he'd care for me.

That was the last thing before the darkness took over me.

 _ **ADRIAN**_

My Rose, seeing her like this I couldn't bare it. I quickly grabbed her arms trying to bring her back from herself.

"Rose! Snap out of it! Look at me!" I saw Rose coming back to herself as she looked up at me and I almost broke. The pain was all I saw in her eyes.

"Adrian Oh God…." Was all she managed to say before she collapsed into me. I was holding her up because I knew she couldn't do it on her own. I would hold her up from here on. I felt her sobbing into my chest. It hurt me to see her like this.

I needed her to know she would be okay. "Shhh Rose. I told you. I'll take care of you".

I felt her sob a little louder and then felt my hold on her tighten as I felt the full force of her body. She wasn't heavy but it had taken me by surprise.

"Rose! Rose wake up" I felt a light hand on my arm and noticed Dr. Olendzki behind me.

"She's simply fainted, this must have been a big shock to her, just place her on the table"

I quickly composed myself and lifted her up a little higher until I could reach down and grab her below the knees. I pulled her up into my arms and placed her onto the examination table brushing the runaway strands of her beautiful hair behind her ears.

"I think the best thing we can do it let her rest" With that she left.

I sat on the chair nearby and reached for Rose's hand. I looked at Rose and really looked. The strong girl I've always known was always looking after everyone else. For once someone would look after her. I would be that someone. I would take care of my Rose.

I scooted my chair closer to her and leaned over her soft face and whispered into her ear.

"I'll take care of you. I'll take care of both of you".


	4. Chapter 4

**ADRIAN**

"Where is she?! I know she's here. Dammit Adrian I can sense you! Where is Rose?"

Of course she knew I was here, another not so awesome perk of being a spirit user is that we can sense each others magic.

I didn't want her to wake Rose up so I carefully and slowly removed my hand from Roses and left the room, shutting the door behind me with a soft click. Its been a little over a day since Rose and I came to the clinic, the recent discovery of her pregnancy seemed to have been too much for her to handle. She was the strongest women I'd ever met but even she has a limit.

After Rose's initial break down Dr. Olendzki had lead me to a small room down the hall with Rose in my arms. The small room was a simple bedroom that was used when patients weren't sick but needed rest which included a bed, a simple wooden desk with an accompanying chair, a small couch and nightstands on either side of the bed. Rose had awakened from her sleep when I laid her on the soft bed but in the end her body needed the rest and she'd fallen back into a slumber. I had pulled out the desk chair and sat there next to her the whole time, only getting up from the chair when I needed to.

As I turned away from the door my eyes locked onto Lissa's as she stormed towards me.

"Adrian! What's going on? Why wouldn't you tell me where you guys were at!? I had to find out from a moroi boy who said he saw her standing in front of the Clinic yesterday! Whats happening?"

She started to walk around me clearly heading to the door. Oh fuck. No.

I quickly grabbed her by her waist and pulled her away from the door. I could see the surprise that quickly turned into anger in her eyes.

"What. The. Actual. Fuck."

"Lissa, listen. Rose needs rest right now. I promise to tell her you stopped by when she wakes up but you need to go right now".

"Adrian, its me. Lissa. Rose's bestfriend, practically sister. You cannot tell me to go, you should be going." Anger clearly laced in her voice.

How would I explain to her she needed to leave without telling her what's going on. I wasn't sure if I was making the right decision but I did know Rose would want time to process this and think of how to tell Lissa herself.

"Lissa I know. I know. Please. If you care about Rose you'll leave. This is what Rose wants right now."

That quickly quieted her down and I could see the hurt in her eyes.

"Rose told you she didn't want me here?"

Ahhhhh. Shit.

"Cousin its not like that. She just needs time. She's not hurt or in danger. She just needs rest."

"Adrian, I just want to help….. I want her to be okay. She hasn't been okay since the attack. I know its a lot losing a mentor but still she should talk to me. "

"She will, I promise. But right now she needs to rest and yelling out here will probably wake her up"

"I'm sorry…." A barely hearable whisper. "I just wanted to help"

"I know"

"If anything changes you will tell me" It wasn't a question but I could here the desperation in her voice. With that she turned around and turned the corner of the long white hallway.

I let out a sigh of relief I hadn't noticed I was holding in till now. I really hope Rose had slet through that.

I turned and slowly opened the door stepping inside. As I shut the door I lightly rested my head against the cool door. I was so tired once Rose woke up and was ready to go I would crash in my room for the next few days. Hell I wouldn't mind if she wanted to lay with me for those few days. I turned back towards the room and was met with brown eyes filled with sadness. I wasn't sure what I was expecting. Maybe she would yell at me for sending Lissa away. Maybe she would tell me I had no right to intervene.

"Thank you" she whispered to me.

"What for?" I asked as I approached her and sat down on the side of the bed. She sat up against the cool wall the bed leaned against.

"For not letting her in. I love Lissa and not telling her is killing me but I just can't right now. I need time. I need to figure what I'm going to do about it."

"Do about it?"

"Yeah. What am I going to do about being pregnant."

"What do you want to do?"

"I don't know. I can't be a mother. I don't know how to be one. I don't even know if I want to be one…"

I sat there quietly. Would she consider not having this baby at all? Would she have an abortion? "Rose. You know I support you in whatever you want to do. If you don't want to have this baby it's your deaccession and no one else's. If you decided to keep it, Rose I will support you in every way imanigable"

"Adrian I can't ask you to do that"

"Rose you're not asking, I'm offering. If you want to keep this baby I'm ready for it. I'm ready to be there for not only you but for your child. I'll support you emotionally, physically, financially."

"Adrian, no. I wont let you." The tears seemed to want to make their escape as I heard her voice crack.

She didn't trust me. She didn't think I was ready to grow up and be responsible. I could be. I could be for her. I felt hurt that she didn't trust me.

She must have seen the pain in my eyes because she quickly spoke up. "Adrian its not that I don't think you would do all that for me..for us…. But I'm not even sure I want this pregnancy. Even if I choose to continue with this I'll never let you give up your life for this.."

"Rose I wouldn't be giving up my -" she quickly cut me off.

"Adrian. This is my problem, not yours".

I could hear the determination in her voice and I knew that she had had the last word.

I pulled her soft body towards me and I could feel her come willingly. Wrapping my arms around her I gave a soft kiss to her temple. "You know for youi would do anything".

"I know".

"I love you Rose."

"I know Adrian. I wish so badly right now it was you."

"For now, I know its not. Maybe one day it will be". She didn't say anything. She didn't have to because we both knew. I wasn't the one she loved. Dimitri was.


	5. Chapter 5

**ROSE**

It had been a few days since I was out of the clinic. Three long days of avoiding awkward questions on how I was and if anything was going on from my friends. More particularly Lissa. She knew something wasn't right, she knew I had been in the Clinic but she hadn't known why and I intended to keep it that way. For now, the story was that my body gave up on me and needed rest from all the stress and in many ways that was what happened but that wasn't just it.

Adrian had stayed close to me, eyeing me from the corner of his eye. I swear everywhere I went he was there. It wasn't like a stalker thing, no. It was a protective thing. The morning after I left the Clinic Adrian had showed up at my dorm with doughnuts and hot chocolate. It kind of hurt to take the chocolate because it reminded me of Dimitri but I took not wanting to hurt his feelings. Adrian was hell bent on getting me out of my dorm that day and he succeeded. We didn't do much except hang out with our friends but it still made me a bit happy. At the end of the day he would walk me to my dorm as if it was the most casual thing. That's how its been for the last couple days and to be honest I actually like having him around. It makes it easier. Easier to live. In a few days classes will be starting again and I'm so thankful for the period of no school that we were granted after the attack. Everyone needed healing, some more than others.

With classes starting soon I could feel the pressure of making a decision weighing down on me. I couldn't go back to my physical training classes if I decided to continue my pregnancy, made that clear and was expecting an answer soon. I wasn't sure if she had told Kirova yet, I'm assuming so but Kirova hadn't approached me yet. If I wasn't going to keep this baby my priority woudn't be finishing school though. Not now. With everything going on I still hadn't forgotten what I initially wanted to do. I wanted to go after Dimitri. Being pregnant put a pause in those plans. I couldn't go after Dimitri being pregnant. Could I? No, I couldn't. At least I don't think so.

Uhhh what do I do? I need to free Dimitri but at what cost? This baby, this baby is Dimitris and he would have loved him or her? Could I love this baby though? Could I live knowing I wasn't able to save Dimitri because of this baby?

"Hey Rose, you okay?"

My head quickly snapped up bringing myself out of my inner conversation. I was at the lunch table with Lissa, Christian, Eddie, and Adrian.

"We called your name a few times, you feeling okay?" asked Eddie at the same time Lissa sent me the same mental question.

"Yeah, sorry. Must've been daydreaming." My eyes quickly caught Adrian's and I could see the understanding in his eyes. He knew I had a lot on my mind all times of the day.

A tall dhampir, one of the replacements they sent after the attack, walked up and stood in front of me.

"Rose Hathaway?"

"Yeah…."

"Headmaster Kirova would wish to speak to you in her office at this moment"

Worry quickly rushed to my eyes. She knew. Fuck she knew.

Adrian shot up and waked around to my side of the table. "Come on Rose, lets go"

I could see the question in everyone's eyes. Why is Adrian coming with me. I didn't know what to say to them so I just got up and headed out of the dining hall with Adrian close by. I could do this. I could do this with Adrian here. Before closing the doors behind us I could feel the twinge of pain and jealousy through the bond. Lissa was hurt, she was hurt to think that I had wanted Adrian's support over hers. At that moment I swore to tell her what was going on after I saw Kirova.

Sitting in the chair in front of Kirova's dark wooden desk made me feel small. Her death stare made me feel even smaller. She didn't even give Adrian a second glance as he sat on the chair next to me.

"Rosemarie. Dr. Olendzki stopped by earlier. I'm sure you know what about."

"Yes. "

"There are not enough words to describe how I feel right now. Lets just sum it down to one word. Disappointment. You had…have… so much potential. Now you've thrown it all away. This is your future and you've ruined it. What is it you are expecting out of life now? And you Ivashkov, there will be consequences. She is still underage and this behavior was unacep-"

I cut her off before she oculd continue "He's not the father.." I whispered.

"Pardon me, what did you say?"

"Adrian is not the dad, he is just here for the support. "

"Who is"

I didn't know how to answer that…

"I don't know…"

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"I don't know."

"Rosemarie, what happened."

"I don't want to talk about it"

"Oh, surely you must know that you will tell me or else-"

Cutting her off once again I whispered hoping that she could hear "I don't even think I want to keep it"

"That is a serious deaccession you will have to make"

"I know I just need time. Time to think it through."

I could see Kirova thinking this through. I was sure she would make me leave the academy.

After what seemed like a long time Kirova cleared her throat. "Very well. I will not pressure you on making a deaccession. Classes are resuming in two days though, you will be pulled out of all combat classes and in the meantime I will think of something for you to do. You may leave"

I stared at her for a while, bewildered at what she had just told me. She would let me stay. At lease for now but that was good enough. I felt Adrian's hand rest on my knee giving it a squeeze before getting up. I followed behind him and into the hall. Closing the door behind us I felt Adrian's warm arms around me as he whispered into my ear. "You can stay"

Looks like I wasn't the only one worrying about that. A small smile spread on my face but quickly fell. This was temporary, I would make a decision.

I headed to my dorm room alone, telling Adrian I need time to think. What was I going to do? Fuck.

I needed sleep. I couldn't handle this. I would find Lissa leter and tell her everything. I walked into my room and quickly stopped in my tracks. There standing in the middle of my room stood the last person I ever wanted to see, Janine Hathaway.

I closed the door behind me and gave her the best Hathaway smile I could. "Hey, when did you get in?" asking casually.

"Drop the crap Rosemarie. You're pregnant." It wasn't a question but rather a statement.

"Oh, yeah."

"How could you let this happen? Who is the father"

"I'm sure you know how it happens since I'm here. As far as the father goes I will not say"

"Your sarcasm is not appreciated right now. The father needs to step up and do his obligation."

"Gee, of course he does. Everyone does, right? Oh wait. No, they don't considering I don't even know who the fuck my father is."

"Watch your language Rosemarie!"

"STOP IT! Stop calling me Rosemarie its annoying as hell"

"I will do as I please young lady. You don't know what a huge mistake you've made. This will run your life!"

"Like I ruined yours, huh?" Her anger quickly masked into an unemotional face.

"We are not talking about us"

"No? Why not? Did I ruin your life?"

"Rosemarie of course not… -"

Quickly cutting her off I spoke with venom "Of course not since you dropped me here the second you could. I've only seen you a handful of times before the attack"

"You don't know what you're talking about Rose. It was hard leaving you "

"I'm sure it was" laughing a bit with sarcasm.

"What's your plan?"

I didn't know how to answer her, I didn't have plan.

"I don't know..."

"Rose. You need to figure it out"

"Don't you think I know that?! Of course I know that. I just need time. I just found out!" The tears were no longer being held back. I could see that it took Janine by surprise. After loosing Mason, she had been there for me and even after the attack. We had grown closer in the last few weeks but still I knew it took her by surprise.

I sank to my bed and sat on the edge dropping head in my hands. I felt her walk towards me and squat down so she was face leveled with mine. She reached out and wiped the tears that stained my face.

"You're going to be okay. We'll figure it out."

"Mom?"

"Mhhhmm"

"Did you ever consider abortion?"

I felt her tense in front of me before relaxing again.

"That's hard to explain. The thought did pop into my head the second I saw the test but it only lasted a few seconds because I knew I couldn't do it. Your father was so excited. Him being excited made me excited and gave me all the strength I needed."

"He was?"

"Yeah, he was. I remember it so clearly and I could see the pride and joy in his eyes of having a baby"

"Why isn't here then.."

"That's a story from another time."

"One day then."

"Rose, are you thinking about abortion?"

"I think so. I don't think I can do it Mom. I can't be a mom. I want to be Lissa's guardian and I want to do that for the rest of my life. What should I do?"

"That's for you to decide sweetheart. This is something for you to think about. Whatever you decide I will stand behind it, just know either option wont be easy"

"Thank you" hardly a whisper.

 **Hey Guys,**

 **I know this is such a no action chapter but it needed to happen i hope you understand. The next chapter is another needed to happen chapter but after that the plot gets oh soon juicy. Thanks for the awesome reviews! i know it took a little more than a week to update but i hope i can make it up to you guys.**

 **On a side note, how am i doing? Are you guys still interested in reading my story I'm so nervous you guys don't like it.**


	6. Chapter 6

KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK. KNCOK.

Loud knocks woke me early the next morning. I was ready to let them keep doing it and hope to fall asleep until I felt Lissa through the bond on the other side. I also felt the anger. Shit she knew.

I opened the door and she darted in pushing me aside.

"How could you not tell me? Do you not trust me?"

"Lissa, its not that I just needed time to think about it…."

"Oh is that so? You told Adrian first! Adrian! I had to sneak into the Clinic and used compulsion to get to your medical files to find out." If I want in this situation I'd probably have wanted to high five Lissa for being so daring.

"Lissa, listen he knew! He knew before I did!"

"What the fuck Rose that doesn't make sense. "

"He saw two auras on me"

"What….."

"Two auras. One for me and one for … for the baby"

"Oh."

"Lissa I wanted to tell you but I didn't know how."

"Rose I'm your best friend you should be able to tell me anything"

"I know, im sorry Liss"

"God Rose, what are we gonna do now?" she said as she brought me into a tight hug.

"We?"

"Of course we. I'm not leaving you to handle this on your own Rose. You'll be the best mommy and I'll be the best aunty"

I slowly pulled away avoiding her eyes.

"Maybe we wont have to be"

"What?"

"I said maybe we wont have to be."

"Rose are you talking about abortion?" She said it like taboo.

"Yeah Lissa I am."

"We can do this Rose. You don't have to do this. Adrian will help."

"Adrian?"

"Yeah, he'd quit his ways to be a dad. "

"Lissa, Adrian isn't the father"

"What….Who is?'

"Lissa I promise to tell you just not right now."

"You don't trust me?!"

"Liss of course I do. I just need to take this one step at a time. Liss the father isn't in my life and there's no possible way he'll be In the baby's if I keep it. Please just drop it Lissa, ill tell you soon I'm just not ready right now."

I could see the determination in her eyes but I could see the sympathy as well. "Okay Rose. Its just us two"

"Liss, like said I may not have the baby. Lissa if I do I cant graduate, I cant be your guardian."

"Why not?"

"Lissa I'm pregnant! I can't finish my combat classes."

"Fine then you'll just live with me as my best friend! You know there's enough in my savings to support us all for a few lifetimes"

"Liss I love you for offering but I will not live off of you."

"So its be my guardian or have a baby?"

"I…I don't know…. I think so."

"Rose I love you, you are my family. I will help you in whatever you want to do"

"I know Lissa, you're my family too"

Classes were starting today and while I hadn't made a decision yet I was happy to still be here. Kirova had offered me something I just couldn't resist. Instead of taking my combat classes (which I was terribly bummed out about missing) I would help with teaching and training. I would assist the teachers in anything they needed except actually fighting. Teaching moves an tactics was fine, actually putting it to use was a no no.

No one had seemed surprised or suspicious about this. They all thought it made logical sense since I was only one of the few novices who fought strigoi and successfully killed so many. If it wasn't under these circumstances, I would feel honored they thought so highly of me.

Two weeks had gone by like this and I had finally told Eddie. Eddie seemed to have figured it out by himself though because he didn't seem surprised. When I asked him about it he said that he had caught Lissa and Adrian glancing at my stomach more than what was normal.

At the one month mark I started feeling the symptoms. God I was so hungry! I ate 9 doughnuts one morning and didn't hear the end of it from Christian. Adrian was still around maybe more so now than ever. I liked Adrian being around and maybe one day I'd love him.

 **ADRIAN**

"Hey Rose, you got a minute" I caught her after class hoping to talk to her for a long while.

"Yeah lets go back to my room"

I followed close behind her and watched the way her hips swayed. God she was sexy. She was more than sexy, she was radiant. Literally I think pregnancy glow is a real thing. Stepping into her room I closed the door behind us as she scooted to the top of her bed and patted in front of her. Once upon a time I would have thought I was dreaming of this but this had become a norm for us.

"What's up?"

"Rose….We're getting worries" Her smile quickly dropped.

"We?"

"Dr. Olendzki and I think you should start taking care of yourself better if your planning on keeping the baby"

"You have no right to be talking to my doctor!?"

"Rose you're 5 weeks in. If you are going to do this, you need to see her more regularly and get vitamins and shit"

"I haven't decided I'll keep it though!"

This woman drove me crazy sometimes.

"Rose you need to decide before its too late. This isn't a game, its real!"

Tears slipped down her face and I couldn't resist it anymore. I pulled her against me and rested my arms on her lower back.

"Rose talk to me. What's going on in your pretty head"?

I felt her sob into my shirt before clearing her voice. With her head still in my chest she finally talked to me about it.

"Adrian. I've thought of it I just don't know what to do. Originally I was going to leave before graduation and go after Dimitri. If Kirova still lets me I'd like to graduate first. But I have to take my trials and I can't to that pregnant. I think I have to be not pregnant to do that in order to graduate. I'd have to loos the baby. If I lost the baby I could graduate, go after Dimitri, come home and be there for Lissa. Sounds so easy but its not! It's a baby Adrian. A life. Not just any baby but his baby. It's the last living reminder I have of him. This baby may have happened my accident but it's a miracle it did. Dimitri always wanted kids, I knew he did and I never really wanted any because I didn't think I'd ever have that chance. Now that I do can I give it up? Can I intentionally get rid of his baby?" I could hear the pain in her voice.

She had to choose between having his baby or being able to free Dimitri and still be a guardian.

I started rubbing circles in her back as I tried to ease her tension. I slowly laid us into the bed still holding her tight against me as she rested her head on my shoulder. We didn't say anything else that night because there was nothing else to say.

I wanted to help Rose, I needed to but at the end of the day this fell on her.

 **ROSE**

I woke up to an empty bed and a note on my nightstand.

Little Dhampir

 _Sorry I'm not here. I received an urgent call from my mom that I had to attend to. Don't worry its not important anymore just a little misunderstanding. I'll see you later tonight, text me if you need me._

 _-Adrian_

I smiled at the small sweet note. I wish I could love him, my life would be a hell of a lot easier. I quickly took that thought back. No, I would never wish to lose the love I had with Dimitri. It was something more than life and ill carry it with me forever.

I hopped out of bed and was hit with nausea. Shit. Shit. Shit. I ran to the waste basket by the closet and rid my stomach of last nights' dinner. I fucking hated throwing up which I've been doing a lot of lately especially when I first wake up. I wiped my mouth and slid down my closet door, what am I doing? I can't be a mom. I looked down and for the first time since I found out I was pregnant I rested my hand on my stomach and started to caress it. I'd be giving up so much.

A part of me had hope. Maybe I could go after Dimitri still pregnant. I could be careful. I could be really careful. He wouldn't even know I was pregnant. I'd kill him and come home. Have the baby then redo my senior year so I could take my trials. I could be Lissa's guardian. I could have it all.

I mentally slapped myself. I'm so stupid. I can't have it all. My eyes wandered off into the distance and landed on the backpack open on the floor. From here I could see the small little tube barely sticking out of the front pocket. It was the lip gloss Dimitri had given me after I had been a guardian in training. Lissa had convinced Kirova I should go shopping at the mall for a dress since I had been on good behavior and Dimitri thought so too. We took that time to help further my guardian training.

The lip gloss tube also brought back the memory of sitting in the car on our way as Dimitri and I talked. We had both agreed that we would rather die than become Strigoi. That thought brought me so much pain. At that moment I made my decision.

I would go Dr. Olendzki and tell her what I wanted. How could I be so selfish. Dimitri needs me. At the end of it all I love Dimitri more than anything.

I dropped my hand from my stomach and stood up. I would go to the clinic and figure out the best way to do this.

In a few days I will no longer be pregnant.

 **SOOOO what do you guys think?**


	7. Chapter 7

I let out a small breath and a sob escaped my throat as I leaned against the wall. Get yourself together Rose, get yourself together. You wanted this Rose. In the end you wanted to do this. I pushed myself off of the wall and headed towards my dorm not wanting to be this close to the Clinic. I needed to breathe and I needed to do it without anyone around me. I needed to break down and I didn't want anyone to know.

The walk to my dorm seemed longer than usual. I wasn't moving very fast but it wasn't that, it was the thoughts and feelings. My mind was swarming with such strong thoughts I wasn't sure how it hadn't shut down on me yet.

Dimitri would hate me. If the old Dimitri was here I knew he would hate me so much. But he wasn't. The new Dimitri wouldn't care whether I did it or not. He wouldn't care for me or any baby. My heart ached. I felt the pain burn in me. I wouldn't have been a good mother either way.

I walked into my room and was ready to hit the floor when I saw Adrian leaning against the wall by my small window. Shit, what horrible timing. I hoped I didn't look as fucked up as I felt. I gave him a fake small smile but the look he gave me told me to cut the bullshit. We stood there staring at each other.

"Rose." The way he said it and the look he gave me was enough to tip me over the edge. I slowly fell to knees and dropped my arms to my lap feeling the tears streaming down my face. I'm a horrible person who needs to go to hell. I felt warm soft hands grab me and lift me up before resting me on my bed.

I turned to face the wall as I felt the tears flow out faster. He knew. Adrian knew. I don't know how but he did. I felt the bed cave in besides me before I felt his arm wrap around me molding his body around mind.

"You know. "

"Yes."

"You think I'm a horrible person."

"No I don't."

"How did you know?"

"After you left the clinic Dr. Olendzki called me and told me you were upset. I assumed that eventually you'd come to your room. I wanted to be here when you did."

"You're too good to me Adrian. You shouldn't be."

"That's for me to decide… Rose… Are you sure about this?"

"Yes..No…I don't know."

"Rose its not too late. You haven't taken the first pill yet have you?"

"No I haven't."

Walking into the clinic earlier I thought I knew what I wanted to do. She seemed surprised when I had told her I wanted to have an abortion but she quickly masked her face and got down to business. There were two options. Option one was a surgical procedure and Option two was 2 little pills I would take. I chose option two. Dr. Olendzki told me I had to take the first pill in front of her but I just couldn't do it. I wanted to be alone. She gave me one small nod in a way of understanding before giving me full instructions. I would take the first pill and be in pretty bad pain that would last a few hours and would take the second pill 24 hours later.

The pill sat heavily in my pocket. I wish I wouldn't have to make this decision. I wish I wasn't pregnant because being pregnant really sucks right now.

I thought I didn't want this. I thought that I could be okay doing this bus could I?

I felt Adrian's arm tighten around my waist.

"Little Dhampir, you don't have to take those pills if you don't want to. If you do that's fine but once you take it, you can't go back. There will be no going back."

"I know Adrian… I know. I just feel like I'm torn between two very different options that will change my life one way or another."

The pills have been sitting in my night stand for the last 3 days. I was so confident a few days ago on what I wanted to do but now I'm lost….again. Why can't this be easy for once? Why can't my life just rest down for a bit…. Just enough to let me catch my breath.

I continued to walk by the line only bothering to reach over and grab a water bottle and orange. Walking towards my regular lunch table I looked up to see only Lissa there. Shit. I would have turned around but she had already seen me.

"Hey Liss" placing my food down on the table and falling into my seat.

"Is that all you're eating?"

"Liss I'm not hungry"

"Rose, the baby needs-"

"Liss stop it!" cutting her off.

I could see the hurt in her eyes.

"Liss, I'm sorry. I know you mean well. I'm sorry. I'm just stressed." I sighed and rested my head on the table. I felt lissas warm hand rest on my arm.

I heard Lissas voice through the bond. _Talk to me._

I looked up at her and then looked around. I hadn't seen sparky or Eddie yet.

"Okay…" I whispered hesitantly. I moved next to her and with a hushed tone I told her about the pills and how I wasn't sure what to do. This was definitely no place to have this talk but I needed to tell her, I couldn't hold it back anymore.

"Oh Rose, you should have come to me sooner."

"I know Lissa. I'm going to be better about that now. "

Through the bond I felt Lissas joy, maybe not about the topic but at the fact that we were talking. I was about to ask her how she was doing when Jesse walked up. Jesse had been expelled for what he had done to Lissa and while the thought of it still made me mad he deserved what he got… he actually deserved more but being expelled would have to do.

"What are you doing here?" Raising my voice in anger.

"Calm down Rose, I'm only here to pick up some paperwork and thought I would say hello"

"Hello, now go." If he did not leave now I would punch him or worse.

"Actually, one last thing. You see, while in Kirova's office finishing up paperwork she stepped out for a moment. In that moment my eyes wandered around the room. Do you know what they found Rose?"

"I don't fucking care you little shit" I could feel my anger boiling.

"Oh but you should Rose" Giving me a knowing look.

Oh no. He knew. He had to know. He had that look.

"Jesse, please, go"

"Oh I will Rose, believe me I will. I just want to know one thing…" Clearing his voice and speaking a little louder gathering the attention of many around us. "Who is the father"

I almost passed out. "Whhhaa…what are you talking about". Did I just stumble my words, I never stumble my words, crap.

"What I found on Kirova's desk was a file with your name clearly marked on it. I couldn't resist now could I? Hmmmm almost 6 weeks or have you decided to kill it Rose."

I felt my skin pale as I thought of what to say back. I could hear the whispers around me. I wanted to deny it and I would have but I was stuck, frozen.

"You're such a filthy bloodwhore Rose. I'm glad I hit that before you became a little slu- ahhhhhh"

Jesse was quickly pulled away from our table and pushed against the wall.

"What the fuck? Let go of my hand you little bitch."

A girl very close to my height and clearly a dhampir by her body frame twisted his arm tighter inflicting more pain.

"You don't fucking talk to a girl like that. If she is pregnant it doesn't concern you. Don't you ever do that again or this pain will feel like nothing." With that she gave it one more tight twist pulling a yell out of him before letting him go. Jesse ran out of there faster than my eyes could follow.

I was once again frozen in place. Not because of what had happened, no. I was frozen in place because of that voice. It was so similar…so similar to his. The accent I once upon a time would have never guessed correctly was from was clearly Russian.

I could hear steps approaching us quickly and I was only vaguely aware of Eddie and Christians voices.

The girl turned around to face our table with a smile on her face and I immediately locked eyes with her.

Her eyes.

They were his eyes.

Her eyes were the same as Dimitri's.

That was the last thing I saw before I felt my legs give out and I fell into blackness.

 **Ohhh, who do you guys think it is?**


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